Ministry of Reconciliation

"Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others. But what we are is known to God, and I hope it is known also to your conscience. We are not commending ourselves to you again but giving you cause to boast about us, so that you may be able to answer those who boast about outward appearance and not about what is in the heart. For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. 

From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. 

Working together with him, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain.  For he says,  

“In a favorable time I listened to you,
and in a day of salvation I have helped you.” 

Behold, now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation. We put no obstacle in anyone's way, so that no fault may be found with our ministry, but as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: by great endurance, in afflictions, hardships, calamities, beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights, hunger; by purity, knowledge, patience, kindness, the Holy Spirit, genuine love; by truthful speech, and the power of God; with the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and for the left; through honor and dishonor, through slander and praise. We are treated as impostors, and yet are true; as unknown, and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as punished, and yet not killed; as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything. 

We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also.  2 Corinthians 5:11-6:13

A new ministry begins today. Oh God please bless it.  Please lead me.  Please capture this to be about You, not about me.  May Your gospel and Your good news move us.  Help me know how to move forward!  Please hold me and carry me.  No matter what - I am Yours.  My future IS secure.  This is just how I am spending some of this life You've given me - and somehow it is intricately connected to You and to that very eternal future I have with You.  And to others' eternal futures too!  Wow.  Mysterious.  Glorious.  Please seal me to You.  Please seal this new ministry to You.

It's all Yours - my faithful and powerful God.

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Child of the King

Thank you Jesus for 7/18/2014. It was good to be with You. I think I'll take Wednesday as a day of prayer with You. A lot is going on...and a lot seems to be on the horizon. I sense Your movement, sweet Jesus...I'm eager to remain near to You.

My main ask - please make me a child, one dependent on you, a child leaning in on the King. A child of the King is set for her life. She does have quite a bit of an intense & fierce life before her, but she would not trade it for anything. And, truly, the intensity and ferocity is the King's to lead through. She need only to follow Him and stay near to Him. She gladly does - she would not want it any other way. She identifies herself with the King and that truly shapes and moves her life and future direction. He is a glorious King. One that is so worthy to be followed. His ways are certainly mysterious and creative. Only He knows how to meet the needs of such a mysterious and broken world. He is the Author and, therefore, He is the perfecter - He is the only way. She knows it. She clings to Him. Gladly.

Jesus, please awaken my heart to what You are calling me to. So many dreams, passions, & personal leanings are being awakened. You are opening doors and inviting me to faithfulness. May these passions be a part of the movement of YOU among Your people. Lord, oh that I and those around me would experience the GOSPEL, to be a part of the movement of Your Holy Spirit among Your people, that by every means possible You might be proclaimed. My heart is heavy that Your name would be highest - in my proclamations, but also in my daily life...to see all things brought into subjection to You - to trust and lean on YOU. God - how do I respond to all that You have initiated? Please hold me fast, claim me to faithfulness.

Oh Jesus, I want to live for You. I want my life to be a living sacrifice to You, Oh Lord. You do not need me, but you WANT me. And I WANT YOU. Lord be glorified.

This was my favorite hymn when I was a little girl. In the church I went to growing up, you got to pick the hymn to be sung right after you got baptized.  I remember thinking, how could there be a greater message to claim today than this? God, You were active then. There is no way I could have grasped the beauty of this hymn without your sweet & powerful grace. To be a child, to be claimed by the most Holy One...is to be claimed and named by the King. Even before walking in my identity as a daughter, I had a fierce and glorious King who was on the move...

In my life Lord, be glorified, be glorified!
In my life Lord, be glorified, be glorified today.

In Your church Lord, be glorified, be glorified!
In Your church Lord, be glorified, be glorified today.

In my home Lord, be glorified, be glorified!
In my home Lord, be glorified, be glorified today.

In my words Lord, be glorified, be glorified!
In my words Lord, be glorified, be glorified today.

Onward -

"These garments, said Christian (formally named "graceless"), were given to me by the Lord of the place to which I am going. Surely they are a token of His kindness, for I had only rags before and when I get to The City He will know me, for I will shall be clothed in His garments." - right before the hill of difficulty

"He went onward, right up the difficult way and as he went he begun to sing,

'The hill, tho steep, I will ascend, for me the toil will not offend
Be brave my heart, and do not fear, for the way of Life leads over here.'"

The Pilgrim's Progress, John Bunyan, written from jail

The rocks cry out and I keep my heart tucked away in a million journals...

I love to write...I have written enough to fill many books...yet I have not written near as much as I probably would want to had I sat down and wrote more regularly!  And where is all this that I have written??  Tucked away in a million journals...collecting dust.  Jesus told the Pharisees when they were making a big deal about His disciples praising Him like crazy, "I tell you, if they are silent, the very stones would cry out." - Luke 19:40

For the last several months I had a recurring health issue...one that goes away just to come back a week or two later.  Hundreds of dollars, many doctor visits, different drugs, pain/discomfort, and several key changes to my lifestyle later, I am **hoping** to be clear of the issue!  At first it was a major hit each time the symptoms returned, and was very disheartening...but this next journal (shared exactly as it was originally written) I wrote right after the symptoms returned for probably the 4th or 5th time.

------written 4/14/2013-----
It's odd...I seem to be in a better place lately when I come down with another infection.  It's probably all the prayers - thank you Lord for friends and family.  I think there is also an element of spiritual readiness that comes with it too - a "this seems like an obvious attack from satan, so I will love and trust God even more" attitude.  I don't ever want to be in a similar place as when I struggled so deeply under significant spiritual attack a couple years ago.  I want always to trust, follow, and obey my good Father.  I want my heart and mind to be set on Him --- so when the health stuff comes up now, it's like - "get ready. get the armor on. and get in the battle - er, truly VICTORY mindset." Because no matter what comes - my Father and Holy Husband is God, the Creator of me, you, this whole world, and even satan himself (I know...that brings up a lot of questions - right?!)...but because of who He is and also what He has done (which has maintained and affirmed who He is (i.e., righteous, glorious, sovereign, merciful, etc, etc!)), He is totally victorious.  And He has a plan.  And He wants me.  He is in me.  He is fighting for Himself through my life...not that He has to do ANYthing other than just be since He is God --- Holy, mighty, all sufficient.  But He has linked Himself with me - lil ole' me - God decided to make me and then seal me with His Spirit, causing me to cry out and to know deep meaning to "Perfect Father," "my Husband is King"...I have a perfect and very good Father and my Husband is King of the Universe --- not only is He King, but also Creator.  There is not one thing that I experience that does not have to fit in His plan and His intention, for His world.  There is nothing surprising here to my Father.  He knows...He cares....He is at work.  I can walk and live confidently in Who He is. My life is not haphazardly lived and truly is not fully (or even close to fully) in my hands...I have an intimate GOD who is totally victorious, loves me, and calls me DAUGHTER & bride too!  I am His bride!  He is taking my filthy rags and exchanging them with "fine linen, bright and pure" (Rev 19:8) - He is preparing me now.  He knows that I am, indeed, a prostitute...a whore who continuously turns her face...but He wants us anyway...He wants to see the whore become His beautiful bride.  Revelation 19:13 ---> Oh Word of God, with your many crowns, make my life cry out Your name - Oh King of kings and Lord of lords!  Do not contain yourself!

Father, please convict and lead my soul away from any and all evil, within and without.  Please Lord, fill me to the overflow...please use this life to Your glory, and please, oh Lord, come soon!

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As he was drawing near—already on the way down the Mount of Olives—the whole multitude of his disciples began to rejoice and praise God with a loud voice for all the mighty works that they had seen, saying, “Blessed is the King who comes in the name of the Lord! Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!” - Luke 19:37-38

Let these Grace-Crushed Bones Rejoice

Paul Tripp has written a bit on something he calls "violent grace"...a brief snapshot:

"You see, we all have a perverse capacity to be comfortable with what God says is wrong. So God blesses us with violent, uncomfortable grace. Yes, He really does love us enough to crush us, so that we would feel the pain of our sin and run to Him for forgiveness and deliverance.

David says in Psalm 51:8, “Let the bones You have crushed rejoice." It's a curious phrase. Crushed bones and rejoicing don't seem to go together. You wouldn't say, "Hooray, I have a broken bone!" But that's very close to what David is saying. He's using the searing pain of broken bones as a metaphor of the pain of heart that you feel when you really see your sin for what it is. That pain is a good thing!

Think about it. The physical pain of an actual broken bone is worth being thankful for because it's a warning sign something is wrong in that arm or leg. In the same way, God's loving hammer of conviction is meant to break your heart and the pain of heart you feel is meant to alert you to the fact that something is spiritually wrong inside of you. Like the warning signal of physical pain, the rescuing and restoring pain of convicting grace is a thing worth celebrating!

So God's grace isn't always comfortable because He isn't primarily working on our comfort - He's working on our character. With violent grace He will crush us because He loves us and is committed to our restoration, deliverance, and refinement. And that is something worth celebrating!"

Reflections on "Violent grace"...November 2012

It's been grace all along.  The Lord has been surpassingly good to me.  The violence in the grace has truly been in my reaction to His command to trust and follow Him.  Trusting and following Him has always been a grace when experienced and has truly never let me down.  My reaction to this command is where the punches start.

With my struggles in fear - there has never been anything that has happened to cause me to fear like I do - GRACE. I still struggle with fear more often than not --- and God meets me there. GRACE. I have created the disaster that makes up most of my struggles --- and God is redeeming them. GRACE. My frequent thought - "I wouldn't have this problem in the first place...if I just trusted Him to care for me" and, somehow, through it all, we (God & I) are even closer and He is strengthening my "trust-Him" muscles. GRACE. I create challenges --- He redeems my heart and brings me closer to Himself, while revealing to me more of Himself and His Word. GRACE.

Psalm 51:8 "Let the bones you have crushed rejoice"

My bones, on their own, cannot take You, Oh God - You are far too great, too powerful, too grand for my wee-bones to stand.

My first birth did not set me up to stand before a fearfully wonderful God.  I was set for death since the very beginning: violent grace.  And everything within me KNOWS it - violent grace!

All the strivings...all were/are flavors of death...but You made them cravings for LIFE: violent grace.

My second birth came when I was devastated by my "first life"...every devastating hole You said You could fill...fill to the overflow: I get to have You. Violent. GRACE.  It's better than a solution.  I get to have You.

My bones were not made to be sufficient on their own.

I use to think they could be...I could try harder, do better.  I could train and get stronger.  But my bones were not made to be sufficient on their own.  What crushed them is that I thought they could be sufficient.  I gave them weight they could not bear.  I was not made to be separate from You, God.  What crushes me is these bones. Violent Grace. You gave me bones that I cannot depend on!  Violent Grace. My bones were not made to be sufficient on their own.  I was not made to be separate from God. Violent grace. I cannot depend on myself, and this is how You created me - I am in desperate need for You...and You are exactly who I need most.

Violent Grace.

Psalm 51:8 "Let the bones you have crushed rejoice"

All is Right

"I need You more than anything.  I am a mess...but God is working miracles in and around me, because He is God and He is far from being a mess. This is right and okay -- He should reign! Kristy, let Him reign over this life! Let Him help you. Be vulnerable because you need God; you need people.  All is right; do not be upset about your inability to save yourself. This inability brings you to the place you were destined to be -- at the foot of Christ.

I pray away the thorns because they hinder and distract me when He purposes them to draw me nearer." - writing archives, 2-17-2009

Growing Dearer Each Day, C.H. Gabriel (1907)

How sweet is the love of my Savior!
’Tis boundless and deep as the sea;
And best of it all, it is daily
Growing sweeter and sweeter to me.

Sweeter and sweeter to me,

Dearer and dearer each day;
Oh, wonderful love of my Savior,
Growing dearer each step of my way!

I know He is ever beside me!
Eternity only will prove
The height and the depth of His mercy,
And the breadth of His infinite love.

Sweeter and sweeter to me,

Dearer and dearer each day;
Oh, wonderful love of my Savior,
Growing dearer each step of my way!

Wherever He leads I will follow,
Thru sorrow, or shadow or sun;
And though I be tried in the furnace,
I can say, “Lord, Thy will be it done.”

Sweeter and sweeter to me,

Dearer and dearer each day;
Oh, wonderful love of my Savior,
Growing dearer each step of my way!

Some day face to face I shall see Him,
And oh, what a joy it will be
To know that His love, now so precious,
Will forever grow sweeter to me!

Sweeter and sweeter to me,

Dearer and dearer each day;
Oh, wonderful love of my Savior,
Growing dearer each step of my way!

Come. See. Follow. Found. Life. Light. Purpose. Love.

 Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." – John 8:12

If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him. "Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? But for this purpose I have come to this hour. - John 12:26-27

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch out your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and your right hand delivers me. The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever. - Psalm 138:7-8

And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, "You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me." – Mark 10:21

The Great Walk

© 2009 Kristy Wakefield

As I pray, I feel His presence come over me.
He begins to show me…
A Dad and his little child walking, hand in hand.
As I watch, I know it is Him and I.
He is walking with me.

He asks me if I would like to go on a walk.
Without a thought I say “yes,”
All the while knowing that this would be more than just an ordinary walk.
He is going to walk with me forever.
He tells me to “follow Him.”
To give up all else and follow Him.
He is walking with me.

We walk, hand in hand.  Sometimes I hesitate, sometimes I run.
He is walking with me.
Sometimes I dance, sometimes I sing.
He is walking with me.

Sometimes He picks me up and carries me,
While other times He gives me a needed push to face the things I fear the most.
When I am alone, hopeless, lost, or saddened by the world,
He knows His purpose.  He knows the direction.
He is walking with me.

When the road becomes too weary, I see His outstretched arms.
He knows how much I need Him.
He gives me strength enough to reach for Him.
He is walking with me.

As He walks with me, He leads.
We walk, hand in hand; He shows me love.
He leads me in the way everlasting.
His path looks crooked from my worldly lenses, 
But His is a straight and narrow path that leads to life.
He is walking with me.

As we walk, I pause.
He gently presses His hand against my back,
“Keep walking with me…I know what is ahead.
Our walk will not be taken by darkness, for I am the light of life.”

He is walking with me.

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“God takes care of the lilies and the sparrows and God will take care of you. Just come.” – Mother Theresa